On Being Suffocated

We started with our Community Residency Programme (CRP) today. Just before I go into telling you more about this programme, I'm going to tell you how suffocated I actually feel at the moment.

First of all, with the ASNA Convention coming up, the supervisor has asked that I start preparing for the poster, and email him before I get it printed.

But to have to do the poster preparation works when I'm in this CRP block, it's quite a problem. Timetable is arranged to the brim for the week, from 9 till 4, literally. We need to do research on thematic project, and would be doing field work and whatsoever stuff. With a full report to be submitted in the end, as how the co-ordinator had wished, I was actually hoping to produce a presentable reports so that perhaps we would have the chance to attend this international conference to be held in early November in Taipei this year. I want I want I want to go!

That aside, the conference is going to be the time when we're going to be busy with the minor postings and our own elective project. I was going to forget about another journal-worth research similar to what we did last year, I'm hoping for one overseas this year. I have yet to decide where, but the compass is somewhat directed towards Australia. Some of the colleagues showed interest in Taiwain, none are opting for Hong Kong, but a few have already shown interest in Down Under. But the problem with doing an elective project overseas, the planning and proposal works need to be done very much earlier, which is why we were briefed about it today.

I was in a dilema, so to speak. The reason as to why I looked for and ended up with our current elective supervisor back then, was because I wanted the experience of doing a research, and to have my work publish-worthy. Lots of work, seriously busy. But it was a good exposure. And I wouldn't turn down another opportunity. However, the chance of doing it overseas would be lost. Unless, there would be one where I could do a short term research elsewhere. Which also requires me to start doing my proposal and look for supervisors in other medical institutions, like starting, now.

There's a student exchange programme to Utretch, Holland, 5 sponsored places. But most of us just sighed at the offer, for at this academic results that I have, I better just stay at home and forget about going so far and embarrass the university.

I was thrown in between.

Having said that, what worries me most now, I don't even know I could pass my exam! Finals is coming up in 5 months time, and I don't really think I'm even prepared for it.

I need some air... And who says medical school is all about studying, examining patients and coming to a diagnosis? Bull-shit. It's an ongoing torture of despair and helplessness. Now added with suffocation.

Just when we all thought the CRP block is going to be a free one, little did we know we actually have to be in Maran, Pahang for 2 weeks in March. Like 2 WHOLE weeks. No chance of us visiting the Taman Negara whatsoever. What a bummer. And Maran is like what, 3 hours driving away??

Okay, complains and grumbles done.

So, where should I start? Oh right. Get the poster done first.