On Clearing History

I came to realize why I have not been able to really let go.

See, when you really like someone, even the little simple messages of "Good night." means a lot to you.

But subsequently, over time, there would be a lot of "Good night"s that it seemed to you that the greeting before bed is getting dull. However, there are some other simple messages that would still make your heart skip a beat.

Therefore, over the days and months, your inbox on your phone gets more and more. But, back to the basic of what it all was, the simple messages that carry thoughts (or at least you think it was), were not deleted and were still stored in the phone.

As sissy as it sound, that was what I did. Keeping messages from someone outside my direct family whom I love. To the extend that when I clear my inbox, mum's "Good morning. How are you today? Hope you have a fruitful day today." received every morning were the first to go.

So yeah. I finally found out why I was still in struggle. Of wanting to let go and move on, yet I was still holding on to that impossible wish...

I did not clear the number. It's not like we're not on talking terms anymore. But rather, I don't think I'll still want to be that naive again.

For all it's worth, after clearing them, I feel like I have finally let go of that huge stone that have been pressing on my heart over the past few weeks.

Just so that you might want to know why I had not been doing this earlier...

That was why.

And well, what I see in this person: independant, focused, cheerful, financially stable (working), so naturally means yeah, I was erm, 'seeing' someone who is older than myself.


So... friends eh? Maybe we could go out for movies again sometimes...