May-Deck-Car

Title: May-Deck-Car
Venue: GSC One Utama
Date: 31st, August 2006
Time: 4.30 pm
Actors: 3 Malay sisters (M1, M2, M3), a Chinese couple (Cmale, Cfemale), crowds, passerby

Scene one: Crowds were queing up at the ticket counter to buy movie tickets. It was a holiday, what do you expect? Besides, it's GSC, who would mind the first row when the chair is darn comfortable? So, there's the Malay sisters walking away after they got their tickets. And the Chinese couple walked towards the conter. And there's a bunch of kids waiting for their turn behind me and my sis.

M1: (turn around and slap Cfemale on the shoulder) Hey you!
Cfemale: (look at M1, turned back to her boyfriend, but turn around and push M1 again)
M1: (staring fiercely at Cfemale) Eh, no need say sorry ah hah?
Cfemale: (look at M1 thinking she's insane) Why sorry?
M1: (you can start seeing vapour from M1's ears) You step on my foot you know?
Cfemale: Oh yea? I didn't feel it.
M1: Of course you didn't, you were wrapping your entire feet with that shit of yours. You step on my right foot! And I can so bitchily scream for pain, but just because I'm not attention seeking, I didn't.
Cfemale: OOOH, I'm soo scared. [Mandarin to Cmale] Crazy lady...
Cmale: [Mandarin to Cfemale] I think so too
M1: (slap Cfemale on the shoulder again) I'm going to slap you until you say sorry!

Scene two: Camera zooms closer to the catfight. Be warned, this scene is meant for those above 18 and isn't uncomfortable with violence. Do use your imagination how the situation was.

Cfemale: Holly molly, you slapped me? I'm gonna slap you back!
M1: Slap me? You are in NO position to slap me, I'm pulling your hair, BIAATCH!
Cfemale: Calling me a Biatch? who are you then? Attention-seeking whore? I'm going to slap you as much as I want!
M1: WHORE?! Hey, I wear my tudung okay! You, biatch... Aaargh!
Cfemale: Whore!!!! Damn you, I'm going to pull your ears!
M1: Let go my ear! You're messing my tudung!
Cfemale: Bitch, aaargh, let go my hair!!!
M1: Fine, I'll let go your hair, but here! Have a goal on your groin!
Cfemale: HAH! I have no balls STOOPID!
M1: Who's stupid now? Looks like your pad's shifted..
Cfemale: F**K, Let's see how's the punch on your breast goes...
M1: Aaaargh! You wanna play gurl? C'mon let's play!

(M2 came back with a box of popcorn and a cup of Coke. M3 behind M2)

M1: M2, this biatch stepped on my foot!
Cfemale: I did not! Ouch, MY HAIR!!!
M2: Say sorry la, Cina bitch!
Cfemale: Shut up!

(And the scene continued with more violence when the girls are practically applying feminine home-trained karate-do and taekwando. Apparently what happened attracted larger crowds. Passerby stopped to watch with awe as well.)

Scene three: Cmale tried to resolve the catfight before everything turned really ugly. He tried to go in between Cfemale and M1, but it seems that with M2 standing behind M1, she tried to stop Cmale from interfering the catfight.

Cmale: Hey hey there ladies...
M2: What do you think you're doing Mister, let get starting too. I'm going to push you...
Cmale: Oh puh-lease... I'm not a bitch... [Mandarin to Cfemale] Cut it out will you?
Cfemale: [Mandarin to Cmale] Attention-seeking whore here is not ltetting it go...
Cmale: [Mandarin to Cfemale] So you cut it, before they call the security...
Cfemale: (Let go and just turn away with Cmale)

(Cmale and Cfemale turned towards the ticket-selling counter and ignored the Malay girls. Feeling unjustified, M1 started to go really attention-seeking-ly insane)

Scene four: Obscene language in the air. M1 started saying real bad things. Well, we're doing a decent play here for the Golden Celebration, so no foul words.... although I personally would very much like to put in all those... erm... really sensitive words.

M1: [shouting in Malay] Oh, so you speak in Mandarin you think we don't know what you are talking about LAH
M2: yea yea..
M1: Who's ashamed now? You stepped on my foot and you didn't even bother to say sorry.
M2: yea yea...
M1: (Pull Cfemale away from Cmale)
Cmale: (trying to stop M1 from starting another fight) Hey hey hey
M2: Oh, please, you don't interfere.

(the whole scene became pretty much ugly. Cmale pushed M2 away while M1 trying to pull Cfemale. When Cfemale pull Cmale, M2 started to push M1. And all of a sudden, "splash". M2 deliberately threw her cup of Coke on the floor. Crowds standing on the front line backed away, grumbling the sweet stuff just going to attract ants to their shoes and sandals)

M1: (in high-decibles) SEE! You dropped my Coke!
M2: yea yea...
Cmale: (pull Cfemale away, whispering in her ear)
M1: There you go again, you think you can bully us by speaking Mandarin?
M2: yea yea
M1: Just beacause we don't understand, doesn't mean you can bully us!
M2: yea yea..
M1: BIATCH! Call us "babi"...
M2: yea yea... what?
M1: YOU'RE THE BABI!

(M1 and M2 walked away. Cmale and Cfemale bought their movie tickets and covered their face. Crowds anxiously looking who they are. Manager of the GSC canteen coming out, ordering his worker to mop up the mess)

~The End ~

Well, this play is based on what actually happened. I mean, for real. The whole thing happened exactly where and when I put on the start of the play. As for the dialogues, they're partly true. Or, erm, 20% of what I heard. I did somehow, spiced it up a bit.

The whole point I put this up again this year, was because, I was feeling disappointed what the late Tunku visioned never came true. If you guys do watch the ads on TV, there's this one with Tunku's golden words at the end, something like "Malaysians living as a big family..." or something like that. But somehow, I think you would understand me when I say I'm so so about Malaysia. I'd like for once, to be proud to say I'm a Malaysian.